The average couple waits 6 years before seeking help for relationship problems. (And keep in mind, half of all marriages that end do so in the first 7 years). This means the average couple lives with unhappiness for far too long.
Manage conflict & increase your connection to each other. I help couples and intimate partners manage conflict to better understand relationship dynamics. Therapy guides you through a process to rediscover intimacy, connection, and friendship. I've helped many people in relationships work together to realize their dreams and lean on each other, even when it didn't seem possible before they started counseling.
Counseling for a variety of concerns that come up throughout your relationship People often seek relationship counseling with me for a variety of reasons.
Partners need guidance with tough decisions and tricky conversations.
Frequently, people call for counseling when they are in intense conflict and don't like how they're managing it.
Others are feeling disconnected and want to put some sweetness and connection back into their relationship.
Life transitions such as moving, career change, new children or adolescent children leaving home can cause stress yet also provide an opportunity to co-create a refreshing new dynamic.
People in new relationships enter counseling proactively because they want support as they move deeper in their relationship and commitment.
Concrete skills and coaching mixed with guidance to build trust and emotional connection If you're like many people who seek help with relationships, you probably want a combination of concrete assistance in addition to guidance in regaining trust and increasing your positive feelings such as connection, fun, and affection. Some of the concrete support I provide is in the form of skills and practice, such as communication skills, repairing your bond after an argument, or help reaching shared agreements regarding co-parenting, money, or lifestyle choices.
In addition to some of the concrete skills and tools you can develop in relationship counseling, I also enjoy helping people in relationship distress regain their sense of fun together, trust in each other, and ability to receive support - emotionally and practically - when they need it most.
A therapist who's affirming and welcoming to your unique relationship I work with couples and family systems of all shapes and sizes, including transgender and gender expansive, same sex, non-monogamous, and polyamorous relationships, LGBT couples, blended families, couples with adopted children and couples considering foster care and foster adoption. I firmly believe that love makes a family, and my work as a couples and relationship therapist is deeply rooted in the belief that all families deserve non-judgemental help from a qualified professional.
Help! I'm having communication / trust issues and arguing with someone I'm not married or partnered to! I think family therapy or marriage counseling might work. Can you help us? Yes! Couples and relationship counseling helps people who are in distress in a variety of settings, even if you've never been romantic partners.
Often, I'm approached by people who aren't romantically involved or biologically related who ask if I think marriage counseling will help them work through their communication or other concerns. In fact, I welcome people in my practice who want to strengthen their work and/or lives together who are colleagues, co-parents, business co-owners, chosen family, or community members.
It's a source of strength when people acknowledge that something isn't working in their relationships and seek guidance to support a better way forward. You won't have to explain why this work is vital and crucial to your wellbeing. I'm passionate about increasing your sense of connection and effectiveness in all of your relationships.
Timelines and sessions to meet your needs My schedule usually works well for relationship counseling as I have availability on Saturdays and evenings. I often meet weekly for 75 minute sessions in the beginning. I'm willing to try shorter or less frequent sessions if availability or finances require it. However, usually the work flows more smoothly and allows more depth of discussion and skill building with everyone having greater opportunity to feel heard and understood in longer, regular sessions.
After the initial phase, we often move to less frequent or shorter sessions more naturally.
Evidence based and research informed methods I began working with couples in 2001 and was trained at the time in Imago Therapy, developed by Dr. Harville Hendrix, and Non Violent Communication, developed by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg. Over the years, I've incorporated a variety of evidence based models utilizing attachment theories, research on emotional connection and conflict repair, each with unique contributions and intervention tools that can apply to your specific goals and situation.
I use a variety of approaches in relationship counseling work, including many tools from Gottman Method Couples Therapy. The Gottman Method is an evidence based model of couples therapy that has been devised from several decades of research about what works in relationships and what works in couples therapy. The therapy is designed to prevent relapse and help you strengthen your bond to move forward together.
I also have over a decade of experience working behaviorally with teens and families, and I work well with parents. There are tools that are useful from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and mindfulness based approaches as well as the attachment and behavior theories I've learned from my work with youth and families.